I'm king of the world!

In last night's State of the Union the President laid out an ambitious agenda as to what he plans to do in his last year in office...

Clear brush from the last 83 acres on his ranch. This will only require 200 days of vacation.

Give more backrubs to tense foreign leaders. Gordon Brown you are first on the list.

Enlist more celebrities in the GWOT, including his favorite actor.

Finally beat Cheney's grandkid at Candyland.

Visit the Alamo and recover his stolen bike from the basement.

Take on and defeat that bag of al qaeda pretzels.

Finish "Cliffs of Dover" on easy level of Guitar Hero 3.

Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?

Ladies and gentlemen the state of our union is... funky fresh.

As we head into tonight's speech with the administration promising to push to revitalize Bush's domestic agenda let's remind ourselves that his sheer incompetence at foreign affairs isn't limited solely to that arena. He's plenty incompetent at things that are closer to home.

One need only to think back to that wonderful time a little over a year ago when bodies floated down the streets of New Orleans to remind oneself of just what a poor administrator President anti-Midas can be. I would hope congress would keep that in mind. He's failed at everything he's tried. Listen politely to his speech and his "new" initiatives and then ignore him and go back about the people's business.