Wednesday, February 25, 2009

The 'Wizard of Wall Street' strikes again!

If I have to read another variation of the "Obama's tax cuts will only save me $14 bucks a week, big deal" meme I'm going to do that magic trick Heath Ledger uses in the "Dark Knight" on myself. Seriously. I have the pencil ready on my desk and everything.

Who the hell thinks $14 dollars a week won't help them out? Is everybody as rich as Paris Hilton? Or just conservatives?

I make a pretty good salary but even then I did some quick math and that money could mean a lot of good things for me. In a month that increased cash could do any of the following...

  • Fill up my gas tank twice.

  • Buy all the bread and milk on my grocery budget.

  • Pay for that oil change I've been putting off because I was short on cash.

  • Pay for one of #1Animefan's visits to her counselor since the insurance won't cover it.

  • Pay for my wife's medicine prescription.

I could go on but you get the idea. I wish these aspiring Mr. Howells who apparently light cigars with $100 dollar bills would just shut the hell up.

Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!

I watched the speech last night and came away convinced more than ever that we made the right choice in November.

Besides Obama's great ability to communicate complex economic issues in easily understandable terms, I got a kick out of how much of his speech was composed of subtle and not-so-subtle attacks on the opposition. He put Republicans in the position of having to choose to cheer against economic recovery, ending the war in Iraq and making sure CEOs pay their fair share.

When Obama mentioned the deficit and Republicans started catcalling he immediately pointed out that he would be tackling that "that deficit that I inherited." He put the jerks in their place.
Indeed- you could tell from Jindal's response to Obama's speech and the Republican talking points in response to the speech that they simply do not have a solution to Obama. If Republicans weren't being propped up by the Fourth Estate they would be completely irrelevant at this point.

Are we supposed to take a political party seriously when the biggest criticism they can level at the President's take on the state of the union is that the President lied when he said "The nation that invented the automobile cannot walk away from it." You guys can't see how ridiculous and petty that is? C'mon, really?

This isn't nitpicking, it's picking micro-organisms of nits themselves.

Putting aside the triteness of the "it was Karl Benz not Henry Ford who invented the automobile" line of argument, do you really want to put your political party in the position of advocating that it wasn't an American that built the auto industry, that the United States really isn't number one? That's a political winner.

If I didn't hate those knuckleheads so much I might actually feel sorry for their clueless asses.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

I hate every ape I see, from chimpan-A to chimpanzee. No, you'll never make a monkey out of me!

This is a bit of an enigma.

On Facebook I recently found somebody named "Doc Zaius" who looks suspiciously like our own Doctor Zaius of blogger infamy. When I asked our Zaius about this denied the Doc Zaius of Facebook was in fact him.

Does Zaius have a psycho imposter who is aping him on Facebook?

(Facebook's "Doc Zaius.)

("Our" Doctor Zaius.)

You would have to admit the resemblance is uncanny.

But what really prompted me to post this was how impressed I was with the doppleganger's Facebook friends list. He's somehow surrounded himself with a bevy of hot babes and celebrities like Belinda Carlisle and Morgan Freeman. I checked their Facebook pages and they appear to be legit. Carlisle provides updates on practicing for Dancing with the Stars for instance.

Consider this- you're Belinda Carlisle who headed up a pretty popular female rock band in the 80's and went on to a successful solo career. In your Facebook email a friend request pops up from somebody who has taken on the persona of an ape scientist in a 70's sci-fi movie. Do you---

A) Report this headcase to Facebook for terms of use violations or
B) Ignore this request as this person is obviously unbalanced or
C) Say to yourself "what the hell" and confirm him as a friend.

That she chose the last option is all sorts of cool.

If it really is you Doctor Zaius, I salute you for the sheer chutzpah. If it's not... well, then I have a new hero.