Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Clouseau is sitting there, in a chair, just like you, with his back to me. Then suddenly, my hands go round his throat, and I begin to squeeze.

From the "Crazy Lady with Too Much Time on Her Hands" file:

KNIGHTSVILLE, Ind. (WTHI) - Months ago, Rachel Jones was shocked to discover her 4-year-old's baby doll seemed to have a hidden message: Islam is the light.

Imagine her surprise when a game for her 8-year-old daughter's Nintendo DS had the same message.

Rachel said she bought the Nintendo game, Baby Pals, as a gift for her 8-year-old daughter after a good report card.

She had no idea the game also contained the hidden message "Islam is the light."

"We were sitting in the kitchen, and she was playing it," said Jones. "All of a sudden she looked at me, and I looked at her and she said, 'Mom, I think my baby said something.' And so I played it back, and it says 'Islam is the light.'"

The hard-hitting journalist who wrote this piece actually contacted the game's manufacturer for comment rather than gently suggesting to Mrs. Jones that she walk, not run, to the nearest state certified mental health professional.

I think I identified the problem:

The Nintendo game has an "E" rating, which means it's suitable for any age.

The toy/ gaming industry should immediately institute a "L" rating so that loonies can avoid paying for something they might misunderstand.


Don Snabulus said...

Islam is the Light.

Dean Wormer said...

Dude, I hate you. :)

Randal Graves said...

Does this mean that Allah is the real Painter of Light®?


Ubermilf said...

I KNEW Thomas Kinkade was involved somehow! He's behind every conspiracy to enslave the human race.

That's why they call it the Illuminati (light) -- everything leads back to him. I tried to tell people Thomas Kinkade was the root of all evil, but no one listened.

I say this as a Crazy Lady with Too Much Time on Her Hands.

Life As I Know It Now said...

see what I have to put up with!

Lockwood said...

Well, in light of all that, I really don't have much to say. I guess I could point out that one of my lights burned out yesterday, but I wouldn't want it written up in some news article. Randal would declare Jihad on me.

ThoughtCriminal said...

NO! A Bud-Light!

Thomas Fummo said...

My dolls used to talk to me and tell me things.
Then I started talking to them about my problems and life in general and they all committed mass suicide in our kitchen sink.

dguzman said...

But isn't Islam actually the light? That's what my car told me.

Dean Wormer said...


Kinkade is to painting what Bill Keane is to the funny pages.


I hadn't thought about it until you mentioned it but you're right. Also- these Islamamaniacs are using toys and light to brainwash our kids. What combines those two things? Lite Bright. Lite Bright is manufactured by Hasbro. Take the "a" out of Hasbro and add a "c" and move the letters around and you get "borsch." The Russians are behind this.


You have the patience of Job.


I wouldn't worry about Randal. He declares Jihad on everyone. The other day the clerk at the laundromat put too much starch on his shirts and Randal declared holy war.




You say it was "suicide" as if they collectively decided to walk into your garbage disposal.


That's so cool! All my car does is tell me to "turn right." Bossy little bastard.

Dr. Zaius said...

Does Islam put it's light under a bushel? That's really the question.

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