Marriage, fun? Fiddle-dee-dee. Fun for men you mean.

Darn those gay activist Senators who voted against the marriage amendment.

A lot of people seem to still have this quaint idea that the constitution is nothing more than a detailed list of the government's rights. They see it as a checklist of rights we've allowed our government to have. Many call these people "constitutional scholars."

I call them maroons.

Those of us out here in Wal-Mart loving middle America know what the constitution is really suppossed to be: a list of the stuff we as citizens can and, more importantly, can't do. So we get to keep guns, go to church where and when we want (as long as it has a cross) and we get to say NO when Nathan Lane wants to tie the knot with Elton John.