Wednesday, December 12, 2007

I MUST stop Christmas from coming!

Since congress is resolved to wasting our time with this crap I've written my own Christmas resolution which I expect them vote through immediately--

Recognizing the importance of Christmas to al Whos in Whoville.

Whereas all the Whos down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot, but the Grinch, who lives just north of Whoville, does not.

Whereas the Grinch hates Christmas. The whole Christmas season.

Whereas the Grinch's shoes are too tight.

Whereas the Grinch's head is not screwed on right.

Whereas the Grinch's heart is too small by the power of two.

Whereas the Grinch was a mean one, a heel, as cuddly as a cactus, as charming as an eel.

Whereas the three words that best describe the Grinch are "stink," "stank," "stunk."

Whereas the Grinch had a wonderful, awful idea to keep Christmas from coming.

Resolved, That the House of Representatives--

(1) Supports Christmas toys, and noise, noise, noise, noise.

(2) Enjoys Who-pudding and rare Who-roast-beast.

(3) Will ring bells and start singing.


Swinebread said...

Fuck! our govt IS really broken!

ladybug said...

Geez, more poo from the freaks who brought you the "War on Xmas"...(otherwise known as crap we pulled out of our a$$es to get the fundies riled up!)

It's folks like that who need to spend Xmas actually being with people in need.....not w/people balling that they can't have their Mall Nativity due to those "Activist Atheists"

Overdroid said...

They should pass a resolution that congress should be considered as important. Except it would be taken even less seriously than this crap.

Don Snabulus said...

I resolve that the we recognize the importance of the New England Patriots football skills.

No really. It is important.

More important than assessing responsibility for the Genocide in Iraq.

More important than fixing the broken emergency response to Rita and Katrina.

More important than providing heat to low-income families this winter.

It makes you wonder if you met one of these "representatives" whether the eyes looking back at you would appear human; whether you could detect a soul behind the glassy lens.

Don Snabulus said...

No offense to OverDroid's icon by the way.

Dean Wormer said...

I'm with don but screw ODs icon. It's blinky anyways.

Overdroid said...

Robots have no souls. Which is why we will have no problem eliminating you meat sacks.