Nothing is Beatle-proof!

Friday Beatles blogging.

Saturday Night Live - April 24th, 1976. Host: Paul Simon. Musical Guest: George Harrison.

Hi. I'm Lorne Michaels, the producer of "Saturday Night." Right now, we're being seen by approximately twenty-two million viewers, but please allow me, if I may, to address myself to just four very special people -- John, Paul, George and Ringo -- the Beatles.

Lately, there have been a lot of rumors to the effect that the four of you might be getting back together. That would be great. In my book, the Beatles are the best thing that ever happened to music. It goes even deeper than that. You're not just a musical group, you're a part of us. We grew up with you.

It's for this reason that I'm inviting you to come on our show. Now, we've heard and read a lot about personality and legal conflicts that might prevent you guys from reuniting. That's something which is none of my business. That's a personal problem. You guys will have to handle that.

But it's also been said that no one as yet has come up with enough money to satisfy you. Well, If it's money you want, there's no problem here. The National Broadcasting Company has authorized me to offer you this check to be on our show. (HOLDS UP CHECK) A certified check for $3,000. Here it is, right here. Dave -- can we get a close-up on this? Which camera? Oh, this one. (CAMERA MOVES IN TO SHOW CHECK) Here it is, a check made out to you, the Beatles, for $3,000.

All you have to do is sing three Beatle songs. She loves you Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's $1,000 right there. You know the words. It'll be easy. Like I said, this is made out to the Beatles -- you divide it up any way you want. If you want to give Ringo less, it's up to you. I'd rather not get involved. I'm sincere about this. If it helps you to reach a decision to reunite, it's well worth the investment. You have agents. You know where I can be reached. Just think about it, okay? (HOLDS UP CHECK AGAIN) Thank you.

A little later in the program George Harrison and Paul Simon performed together:




While this was happening John and Paul were actually in New York at John's apartment and watching SNL together and came one cab ride away from taking Michaels up on his offer. John talked about it in an interview with Playboy-

PLAYBOY: Aside from the millions you've been offered for a reunion concert, how did you feel about producer Lorne Michaels' generous offer of $3200 for appearing together on "Saturday Night Live" a few years ago?
LENNON: Oh, yeah. Paul and I were together watching that show. He was visiting us at our place in the Dakota. We were watching it and almost went down to the studio, just as a gag. We nearly got into a cab, but we were actually too tired.
PLAYBOY: How did you and Paul happen to be watching TV together?
LENNON: That was a period when Paul just kept turning up at our door with a guitar. I would let him in, but finally I said to him, "Please call before you come over. It's not 1956 and turning up at the door isn't the same anymore. You know, just give me a ring." He was upset by that, but I didn't mean it badly. I just meant that I was taking care of a baby all day and some guy turns up at the door. . . . But, anyway, back on that night, he and Linda walked in and he and I were just sitting there, watching the show, and we went, "Ha-ha, wouldn't it be funny if we went down?" but we didn't.

"Funny?" Funny? It would've been the ultimate pop culture put-on and would've never been matched. These guys were offered millions to get back together and then they do it for $3000.00. That would've been a sheer act of entertainment genius.

I'm sure Yoko is ultimately responsible for this not happening. Somehow.